Most Rememberable Quotes

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The One Hundred Club

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The Quotes 

MYRONS My god there in no titaniom anywhere (sic)
KILRIST: there are 2 o's in Titanioom (sic)

LOKAAS: It's always harder and faster with you. (about Irenke)

MAEDEA: That would be why it's called the Hammer of Thorim.
SMILINGJACK: Let's be serious for a moment. You know that it's what his wife calls his penis.

KRILARI: I had an oops!

SMILINGJACK: It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye.
LOKAAS: Or until that call from the clinic.

KRILARI: Hot diggity daffodil!

IRENKE: Go and pull something. Hell, pull everything.
BLACKSHAE: Incoming Freya then.

BLACKSHAE: Mommy... Lokaas is making fun of my Turkey Cutter...

IRENKE: No you're not! You're just worried about the loss of Power Infusion!
SMILINGJACK: Am I really that shallow?
MAEDEA: Yes. Yes you are.

BLACKSHAE: Permission to point and laugh?
MAEDEA: Granted.
LOKAAS: This from a guy wearing a dress.

SMILINGJACK: Don't go there, Irenke. Let dead dogs lie.
IRENKE: Why doesn't the dead dog just stay dead?
SMILINGJACK: It's because you touch yourself at night.

IRENKE: Oh crap! Kril is dead! That's it -- I'm calling a wipe!
BLACKSHAE: Okay then. DIing Jack.
SMILINGJACK: Don't you dare.

LOKAAS: 'oooh lookit what my bubbles do! na na na...' (about Irenke)

KYLOZO: send in the communist bears (sic)

TOOTSIESPAWN: Lokaas just said that you have Irenke sandwiches!
IRENKE: Oh! What's in one of those?
TOOTSIESPAWN: Bread, Irenke, and special sauce.

KYLOZO: OBJECTION! I have found a flaw in your statement now kindly shut the fuck up!

SMILINGJACK: Holy shit, Draklore was keeping up with me all night!
DRAKLORE: Told you, bitch. It was only a matter of time!

SMILINGJACK: This is why you came over from the Alliance side. It was for the comedy. (about Irenke)
BLACKSHAE: Comedy not involving gnomes.

MAEDEA: My opinion is the only one that matters. I am God, you know.

SMILINGJACK: Lokaas, I need you to cut a gem.
IRENKE: What? No please? No 'Would you be willing to?' Just 'Do it now!'
SMILINGJACK: I could suck his dick.

BALEYG: We're going to keep our penises up, then give it to Mixler.

SMILINGJACK: What is the tank's name?
ANYST: It's, uh, Paper-Thin-Armor.

MYRONS: Hey, Jack, can I trouble you for a summon?
SMILINGJACK: Well, it'll cost you gold.
MYRONS: Can I show you my boobs instead?
WEIX: Sold!

IRENKE: Myrons flew!
MYRONS: I can see my house from here! It needs a paint job!

SMILINGJACK: Don't make fun of Bale. He's not here to defend himself.
IRENKE: Well, we can always make fun of Jack again.
SMILINGJACK: I hate you, Irenke.

SMILINGJACK: Kylozo, buy a new computer!
WEIX: Stop downloading porn!!

SMILINGJACK: I have a new way of dealing with threat.
IRENKE: Ah, wait, that was the old way.
SMILINGJACK: No, kill it before it kills me.
MAEDEA: What if that doesn't work?
SMILINGJACK: Then I beg Irenke for a Pain Suppression.

WEIX: Where are we going?
MAEDEA: Tijuana.
WEIX: Can we see a donkey show while we're there?
IRENKE: I thought that you were the donkey show.
WEIX: No, I'm the bear show.
MYRONS: It's hairier.

TERAKIN: Jack would never tell a story. He's Mr. By-the-Book and always serious!

IRENKE: People are still saying Irenke wrong. They say EYE-ren-kee. It's EE-ren-kah.
KRYSINPALLY: yeah EE REN KAH sounds like a wanker :S

ANYST: Raid fact of the day: Smilingjack is the reigning national cock push up champ! He is the reason for the four hour disclaimer on Cialis.

KRILARI: How about I DPS in this gear? ARCANITE REAPER HO!
MAEDEA: I'll kick you. I'll kick you from the raid. And then I'll come over to your house and kick you.

KRILARI: So should we open up on him immediately?
SMILINGJACK: Noooooo. We want them to get aggro first!

SMILINGJACK: I know that last death was my fault. For some reason I was trying to whisper Lokaas 'rrrrrrqrrwrrrrr'.

SMILINGJACK: We should test our gumption and take the Lumbermine next.
IRENKE: Mill. Lumbermill.
SMILINGJACK: Yes. Because how would you mine lumber?
IRENKE: Probably the same way that you mine fish.

SMILINGJACK: The only time that I used it was when some enterprising priest dropped it next to me. Lifetap. Nyomp. Lifetap. Nyomp. (about Lightwell)

IRENKE: I blame Jack. (about a wipe)
SMILINGJACK: Yes, it's my fault. I was downloading porn and it caused other people's computers to crash.
TOOTSIESPAWN: Oh, multitasking.
SMILINGJACK: In more way than one.

FAEDAWNA: I was hoping that she'd have a change of heart.
IRENKE: The only way I'm going to have a change of heart is if I reach into someone's chest and pull out his still-beating heart.

MAEDEA: WWJD? What Would Jack Do? And then don't do it!

JUNINDI: Oh god, he's chasing me all the way to the entrance! (about Koralon)
SMILINGJACK: Stop being a jackass and die already!

HYGEIA: I lost the game.
KRILARI: You rat bastard!

MAEDEA: It sounds like you keep him in a closet. (about Vrost)
IRENKE: Does he like it there?

WEIX: Uh, me no likey big thinky talk. Me talk fire. Fire bad. Fire burn kitty.
IRENKE: Hell, a comment like that, Weix, puts you into doctorate studies as a raider! I've seen how the Horde raids.

WEIX: has earned the achievement title (The Gnome Punisher)
VROST: I want that.

IRENKE: I love my kitty. I'm like, Merow! Hiss! and everything dies! And, no, I'm not doing that again.
LOKAAS: How'd that go again?
IRENKE: Merow! Hiss!

BLACKSHAE: Now that I'm raid leader, for all the time that you've insulted my dress, Kril... You've been pantied!
KRILARI: I still do better DPS than yooooooou!

BLACKSHAE: Where you live again, Tootsie?
TOOTSIESPAWN: I live somewhere between Deliverance and you've got a purty mouth.

TOOTSIESPAWN: Sorry, I'm back! It was an emergency bio; I was just sitting there and then all of a sudden I was like, 'Oh my God, I've got to pee!'
KRYSINPALLY: Because we all need to know when Tootsie pees.

LOKAAS: Your husband is going to come home and see you sitting on the toilet with a wireless keyboard on your lap and is going to ask, 'What the hell are you doing?'
TOOTSIESPAWN: 'I'm fighting Freya, honey! Gimme a moment!'.

IRENKE: We can't hear you, Toots. Your mic might not be in front of your face.
KRYSINPALLY: It's because she's still on the toilet!

BLACKSHAE: We thought that the healers were getting a bit flabby, so we decided to give them a workout.
IRENKE: Who was that? So I can remove you from the healing list.
BLACKSHAE: That was Krysinpally. And Kylozo.

KRILARI: The hell?! We've got Jormungar!
IRENKE: I hate you all.

KRILARI: Kril's dead.
KYLOZO: What's new?

ANYST: What you need is some sexual healin'.
IRENKE: Right now, with how sick I've been, I'm willing to bet that anything inserted into me will blacken and fall off.

IRENKE: Fuck you.
ANYST: No! I don't want anything to blacken and fall off!

MYRONS: Technically we can shoot Jack all we want, but he's already dead so it would just be a waste of bullets and resources.
IRENKE: I think that I logged in at the wrong time.

IRENKE: You shall teach me the awesome ways of the kitty.
WEIX: Step 1: insert claws into back.

WEIX: I just can't get it higher. (concerning his DPS)
GONDARIL: You know, they make a pill for that.

MAEDEA: He'd better drop my pants. (concerning Koralon)
IRENKE: ... I'm not sure how to reply to that.

KYLOZO: Heh, I'm Stoned.
WEIX: Duuuuude.

LOKAAS: Why would I listen to her? I wouldn't even listen to her about Discipline priests. Not that I would ask her anyway; it's not like they're a viable spec or anything. (concerning Irenke)
SMILINGJACK: Dude, she's going to go Unabomber on your ass.

SMILINGJACK: I'm so frustrated I'm ready to pull my hair out.
IRENKE: Wait, so you have hair still?
ANYST: Sure. On the back of his hands.

IRENKE: 'I have balls. Want to see?'.

IRENKE: Everything's better with rockets! Kril, get some rockets!
KRILARI: ima firein mah lazah? (sic)

LOWMARS: I spent 5k gold last night while I was drunk and I have no clue what I bought.
JURIKIRA: How sad is that?
LOWMARS: Mechanopeep. Elwynn Lamb. Leaping Hatchling. Crimson Whelpling.
KRILARI: Who spends five thousand gold on pets?
IRENKE: Apparently Lowmars does, when drunk.

Smilingjack has gone offline.

SMILINGJACK: I used to watch a lot of wrestling when I was a kid. Before it got gay.
WEIX: Wait. Before it or you got gay?
SMILINGJACK: It. I was always gay.

WEIX: has earned the achievement title (Weakest Link) :(
ANYST: Goodbye.

MAEDEA: What are you going to say at work tomorrow?

DRAKLORE: I'm bringing Draklore in for this fight.
DRAKLORE: You just want his totem.
IRENKE: You just love him for his wood!

SMILINGJACK: %$%@ @#%* (#%# @#%@%# @%#@% --
Silence follows.
ANYST: This is your moderator. Jack is so angry that he can't speak any more. Thank you!

SMILINGJACK: If I punched every person who had ever made me angry I'd be sharing a cell in jail with Bale right now.

Regnier has died.
REGNIER: lolwha?
LOKAAS: Bullshit, I had that heal off.
SMILINGJACK: Irenke would have landed that heal.
REGNIER: What a noob.
LOKAAS: Fuck yo' couch.

SMILINGJACK: Grades before raids, Kril.
KRILARI: I know that!

MAEDEA: Remember, Jack, I can globally mute you now.
IRENKE: Why would we want to do that? We can't quote him if we can't hear him!

SMILINGJACK: We here in the Horde like to make things as idiot-proof was possible.

SMILINGJACK: Actually, I'm putting Mighella in charge.
IRENKE: FUCK! Why would you do that?

KRILARI: Hey, Mae, do you know where to get a different set of boobs?

IRENKE: Take two, with more feeling.
LOKAAS: And a lot less fail.

IRENKE: I've got interest in the belt, but I'll pass if anyone else needs it more.
SMILINGJACK: No! You're going to take the upgrade and enjoy it!

IRENKE: I hate you.
LOKAAS: I hate you, too, you slimy troll.

IRENKE: Dicktake?
SMILINGJACK: Yes, dicktake. I bet that Irenke would love to do that all night long.
IRENKE: Hey, I've been told that I'm good at it.

WEIX: I'm Weix James, bitch!

MAEDEA: Save the doomguard, save the raid.

WEIX: Well, you haven't heard what I did to that gnome I found.
IRENKE: I don't want to know.
WEIX: Two words: war crime.

SMILINGJACK: Is that how we flirt in the Horde? 'Hey, baby, I want to take an axe to you.'.

SMILINGJACK: Kill me now.
REGNIER: I would, but my DPS is too low.

SMILINGJACK: But I want to be pharaoh.
IRENKE: I refuse to bow to you. Hell, I won't even be nice to you.

TANZ: Thank you for flying with Tribute to Mortality. We know you have many raids to choose from, but we thank you for choosing us. (mimicking Smilingjack)

SMILINGJACK: Let's get everyone into position so that we can pull.
WEIX: I'm ready, Jack. I'm on all fours.

SMILINGJACK: Leave Krysin alone! You're lucky he's even raiding for you! (mimicking Chris Crocker)

BLACKSHAE: So, does that mean that you're firing blanks, Irenke?
IRENKE: Well, if I'm firing Jack I sure as hell am.
LOKAAS: Jack, I think that we were just called blanks!
SMILINGJACK: I think so. To be fair, I am undead. All that comes out of me these days is sawdust.

GONDARIL: Krysin, you bastage. You killed us.

GONDARIL: See that big machine in the middle of the room?

SMILINGJACK: Tribute to Mortality: finding new and innovative ways to fail.
BLACKSHAE: 'We wipe with style.'.

GONDARIL: Since we're dying first, where's the bike?

SMILINGJACK: Oh, just go and pull already, you grumpy old bag. (about Maedea)

TANZ: Is it a requirement to like you? (about Smilingjack)
SMILINGJACK: No. Actually, it's discouraged.

SMILINGJACK: I'm not actually funny. I'm just very quotable.

SMILINGJACK: So, guys, what are we not going to do?
IRENKE: Come back to this raid.

SMILINGJACK: I'm bad at this game.

LOKAAS: 'Captain Douche' is more accurate.

SMILINGJACK: I pay that thirteen dollars a month or however much it is for this server just so that I can say whatever I want. So nyah.
IRENKE: Nyaaaaaaaaaah.
SMILINGJACK: I'll see your Nyah and counter with a BLLTTPP!!
Silence follows.
IRENKE: I think I'll be the adult here. Fuck you.

BALEYG: That's it. I'm turning this wedding around. We don't have healing assignments.

SMILINGJACK: Swing for my jaw. Or where my jaw would be if I had one.
DAYNK: If by jaw you mean groin, I'm on it.

BALEYG: I need some help. Would you mind helping me with a personal problem?
IRENKE: Sure, but I just uninstalled my webcam.

LOKAAS: Jack 1, raid 0.

ANYST: Hey, look. If Baleyg hadn't taken the plunge and fallen off of that ledge, how would we know how stupid you can be in the fight against Kologarn?

KRILARI: It blowed up.

ANYST: I'm a squishy!
LOKAAS: You're a bad squishy.

IRENKE: I don't feel too confident about a raider who can't find his meat.

IRENKE: Worms to the left of me, worms to the right. Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.

WEIX: No more about the fucking fish. I wake up in the middle of the night screaming, 'DA FEESH! DA FEESH!'.

TRUIDAN: It's so lagged that when I went out to repair, I was flapping my elbows!


KRILARI: You moron. (about Baleyg)

LOKAAS: Now that's too soon, fucker.

SMILINGJACK: There will be no healing assignments. Don't ask.
WEIX: DPS assignments?

KYLOZO: Kril, load up the ICKM!
KRILARI: Why would you get into the cannon? We're not launching anyone!
KYLOZO: I'm the Intercontinental Kylozo Missile!

WEIX: That's no moon.

SMILINGJACK: Out. Get out of my box.

ANYST: Weix! Your fur's on fire!
FAEDAWNA: You mean his feathers.
ANYST: Doesn't matter! He's still flaming.
FAEDAWNA: Just ask his wife!

ANYST: Fae is all-knowing!
IRENKE: And all-powerful!
FAEDAWNA: And don't you forget it.

IRENKE: Lokaas, something wrong?
WEIX: He's being hacked!
DAYNK: They vendored his totems.
LAUDEN: I hate when that happens!

DAYNK: I have to hold their hands, like little old ladies walking across the street. Who I coincidentally also lead to axe-wielding murderers.

WIEX: Hi, my name is Edna. I've got a truck. Mama wants to drive you all night long. I hope you have an eighteen-wheeler. And you like mustaches.

IRENKE: I blame Lokaas! Clearly, his healing sucks.
LOKAAS: Hey, it was your kitty ass that they wanted.
IRENKE: Mmm, kitty ass.

KRIEG: omg my dick hurts...

WEIX: I've got a mage who can join us. Hey, Anyst, want to come to Ulduar?
MIGHELLA: He's already in the raid, dude.

JURIKIA: I was trying. I couldn't grip fast enough...
WEIX: Remember to work the spear i.e. shaft while gripping as well.

SMILINGJACK: Come here, you dumb broad!
IRENKE: Excuse me?
SMILINGJACK: Not you. Some other dumb broad.

WEIX: Excuse me. I've got to dole out some food for the kid.
SMILINGJACK: Don't you have one of those hamster dispensers?
KRIISTAL: Not funny.
IRENKE: Oops...

SMILINGJACK: Nobody likes me.
WEIX: I like you. You a purty boi, Jacky.

WEIX: These guys aren't gemmed or enchanted. That's like putting on a condom then cutting off the tip.

SMILINGJACK: My dice rolls suck.
TANZY: Want me to blow on them?
SMILINGJACK: I always knew that you were a blowhard.

BARATAUR: I was complaining about your lack of motivational support for me.
SMILINGJACK: Would you like a tissue?

LUJZA: Why isn't your damage higher?
REGNIER: It might be because I'm just running around screaming.
TANZY: 'Ahhhh! What am I doing?! What's going on?! Help me, help me, help!'.

REGNIER: I walked in and saw myself falling and then I was like, 'AHHHHH!'.

TYDRIUS: That was perfect until we started dying.
LUJZA: Most runs are perfect until we start dying.

REGNIER: We need to kill this bitch faster so that I can eat.

KILLSWITCHZ: Kill angry.

MIGHELLA: I don't know what I'm shooting.
LUJZA: It'll be a Really. Big. Ship. Can't miss it.

DESMERELDA: On the big ship lollipop. It's a sweet trip as we watch our toons drop, where big mobs play and we eat can-day.

SMILINGJACK: Come on, Irgrak! Let's go frolic with Marrowgar.

KRYSINPALLY: I think that's appropriate. Weix died on a stick.
FAEDAWNA: It's the way he would've wanted to go.

KRYSINPALLY: I think that I'm coming down with a cold.
IRENKE: Nurse Irenke: I'll come over and give you chicken soup.
GONDARIL: I think that I'm coming down with something, too...

KRILARI: Holy sweet Jesus Christ in a hamster ball!

KRILARI: Ghoul-on-Ghoul action.

Kylozo cradles Tanzy in his arms and whispers, 'Don't worry, you'll grow up and be a great pally one day!'
Irenke boggles at Kylozo.

KRILARI: Save me...
IRENKE: Suicide pact?

KYLOZO: First I lol'd. Then I srs'd.

KRILARI: Kylozo shows restraint!
IRENKE: It's a Christmas miracle!

TYDRIUS: I'd worry if you could actually DPS. (about Smilingjack)
SMILINGJACK: I think I died a little inside.

WEIX: Mig will be having an emo Christmas this year. Sitting around his black Christmas tree, putting safety pins in his ears and clothing, while wishing others were more depressed than himself, and secretly listening to Brittney Spears.
BLACKSHAE: What's he want, a merry /wristmas?

REGNIER: Guess what, guys! I have decided to stop being a loser in bad gear!
SMILINGJACK: You're gonna start being a loser in good gear?

KYLOZO: Hey Jack, why does my Demo have more health than yours?
SMILINGJACK: You actually have better gear than I do, but you'd never guess it by the damage meters.

TYDRIUS: Lose some shit, Smiling!
IRENKE: But he's full of it!

SMILNGJACK: Hey, Juni, do you know who's next?
BARATUAR: Uh, umm --.

BARATUAR: I love Frosty. He squeaks when you touch him.
TYDRIUS: Does he squirt, too?

NAKGUG: Your what hurts?
JULCSA: Brain. Ass.
NAKGUG: Why does your brain ass hurt?

MAEDEA: You sound really weird. (about Krilari)
MIGHELLA: You sound like your in a box.
KRILARI: Or this is how I really sound, it is a different headset.
MAEDEA: Or he finally hit puberty.
MIGHELLA: That must be it.

LOKAAS: Jesus isn't as good as me.

KYLOZO: 'Oh, it was my Mirror Image that was attacking the boss.' You're a Shadow priest, you fucking idiot!

SMILINGJACK: No meta. No gems. No enchants. (about Sephirhoof)
IRENKE: No skill.

TAILFAN: Lumber mill! Lumber mine! What the...? Hey, DI!

IRENKE: I just sneezed and this kodo died.
LOKAAS: Every time Irenke sneezes a kodo dies.

IRENKE: That is the ugliest thing I've ever seen on your head and that includes your face! (about Lokaas)

SMILINGJACK: Oh, fuck, that's ugly.
MAEDEA: What is that supposed to be?

LOKAAS: 'Oh, I've fallen and I can't get up!' 'Shut up, grandma! I'm trying to raid!'.

IRENKE: You're a Shadow priest! Why aren't you a top ranked player? (about Kylozo)
KRILARI: Yeah! You and your Mirror Images!
KYLOZO: I can't find the button!

IRENKE: Math is hard!
MAEDEA: Especially if you're in the fourth grade. (about Krilari)


SMILINGJACK: If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at? Oh, wait -- Junindi!

IRENKE: I apologize. I was wrong.
LOKAAS: Can we get that in writing?

Dogue rolls 100 (1-100)
DOGUE: Wow! I actually rolled 100!
SEPHIRHOOF: Quick! Somebody tie him!

MAEDEA: 'Douchewaffle.' Is that a technical term?
MISTY: It is now.

SEPHIRHOOF: I've got the ugly one!
NAKGUG: You are the ugly one!

IRENKE: Lokaas failed!
LOKAAS: Notice the glee in her voice when she says it.

TAILFAN: Dammit, man. I'm a Resto druid, not a paladin!

KYLOZO: Damn, trash. You so epic.

KYLOZO: Man, I should've stayed on the ship.

IRENKE: I'm going Holy this week.
BLACKSHAE: This just in: Hell froze over.

KYLOZO: 'Hi, I'm Grobbulus, and I'm gay!'

KYLOZO: Can I have a summon? I went to this bar and had a few drinks; when I woke up, there were all these dead dwarves around me. I think the police want to question me.

BARATUAR: It's not that difficult to find a walking erect plank of wood.

MIGHELLA: It's what I thought, but I might just be a pervert.

KRILARI: And the creep factor goes up another notch.

SMILINGJACK: Ooooh! Lightwell! Nyomp!

TAILFAN: Where's Des?
DESMERELDA: I'm under Azin.
AZIN: That's not a bad thing.

LUJZA: I don't know what it is about boomkins. They all become suicidal sons of bitches.
TAILFAN: Kamikaze-kin?

SMILINGJACK: We have an accord then. (to Ebonthunder)
TAILFAN: No backsies.

TAILFAN: Here's how this fight goes, Jack: you die and then let the pros handle it!

KYLOZO: I'm Kylozo. I make my own rules.

KYLOZO: Hey! As a human I have a glorious mustache!

ANYST: He changed my key bindings! What a dick!

LOKAAS: I'm not old! I'm aging gracefully.
KRILARI: Like milk.
LOKAAS: Did you just call me cottage cheese, motherfucker?

IRENKE: Nerf Kylozo!
KRILARI: What is he going to get next? A ghoul summon?

INUNE: Hah hah hah! Restraint? What's that?

IRENKE: Kril! Can I play with your MAN CROTCH?
MIGHELLA: It hasn't dropped yet.

MAEDEA: So we're at 199 quotes in the thread.
SMILINGJACK: So who will get quote 200? Will it be Irenke talking about how great her bubbles are? Mighella talking about some emo crap? Or Smilingjack and a stupid comment? (done as an announcer)

MIGHELLA: Bear tanks should be able to wear armor.
IRENKE: So that we can be like the bear cavalry.
MAEDEA: You're seriously fucked.

KYLOZO: That's right -- it's bad joke Saturday night!
MAEDEA: Isn't that everyday?

KRAIGG: It's always easier to beat somebody up with poopy pants.

KYLOZO: Woah! Jack went from cool Tier 1 to cool Tier 10!

MIGHELLA: Jack, my fingers hurt. What should I do?
SMILINGJACK: Take them out of your twat.

TANZY: If it's big and hairy, it works for me!

WEIX: I should bring out my Trogg Dagger.
SMILINGJACK: Keep that in your pants please.

WEIX: Karmak, Karmak, he's our man! If he can't do it, one of the other shamans in our raid can!

IRENKE: You should bubble more.
TAILFAN: Fuck. You.

TAILFAN: No, you should have me go up there after him. (about Deathbringer Saurfang)
IRENKE: What, to give him a splinter?

SMILINGJACK: The only way I run things is to the ground.

DESMERELDA: I think do you wonderful, Jack. You have more balls than me.
SMILINGJACK: ... I would hope so.

SMILINGJACK: Should we start advertising ourselves as an antisocial guild?

SMILINGJACK: Awesome? I can spell awesome. K-Y-L-O-Z-O. Awesome.

MIGHELLA: You're a twit. (to Kylozo)
SMILINGJACK: He just called you a pregnant goldfish!

SMILINGJACK: Why don't you go look up the meaning of 'respect' again (to Kylozo)
KYLOZO: Go fuck yourself.

KYLOZO: They see me rollin'.

KYLOZO: Sorry, babe. I'm savin' the Internets.

SMILINGJACK: It's not that I'm too lazy to masturbate. I just need to ask Mae for my dick back.

KYLOZO: I can has chicken fried rice, preez? Howwwwwll!

KYLOZO: I love this guild. (pause) Even if it hates me...

BLACKSHAE: What do I get if I'm exalted with the Great Insult Trifecta?
KYLOZO: The most brutal gift of all: nothing!

MIGHELLA: Be afraid of my S&M soldiers!

IRENKE: Shrug it off, you pussy. (to Inuria)
MAEDEA: I concur.

LOKAAS: So, how 'bout them Nazis?

TERAKIN: Is Jack really a midget that sits on Mae's lap and plays on a tiny laptop?

MAEDEA: He's not ready for Kylozo. (about Sephirhoof)
IRENKE: None of us are.
KRILARI: You are not prepared!

TERAKIN: I'm a butt man. I only hit in the butt.

TERAKIN: Dammit, don't quote that!

KRILARI: It's off the scale on the suck-o-meter.

SMILINGJACK: Why are there blood beasts here?
KRILARI: Somewhere, somehow, Saurfang just gained fifty Blood Power.
SMILINGJACK: You think I'm joking. Just you wait until we get into Icecrown Citadel. Then you'll be asking, 'Why does Saurfang have fifty Blood Power already?'

SMILINGJACK: One day you'll take my shit seriously.

TANZY: Dirty paladin whore. You going to keep sucking those guys?

VADIOUS: Woah. Wow, that's dirty talk. Save it for the pillow.

WEIX: Give him a break. He hasn't been the same since the Ark. (about Faedawna)

LOKAAS: That was the second dumbest thing that I've ever heard.
SMILINGJACK: What was the first?
LOKAAS: 'I do.'

CLINDRIE: I'll duel you, Terakin.
WEIX: Did you say do or duel?

TANZY: Guess what! I just redid the throne room! (in a lisp mocking Arthas)

LOKAAS: Why are you guys back there?
KRILARI: We're scared.
SMILINGJACK: I choose life.

SEPHIRHOOF: If you hear something clinking, that's me over in the corner shivering in my armor.

JUNINDI: No, no, no, not me.
SEPHIRHOOF: Just wipe it and die, asshole.

SEPHIRHOOF: I can sing! If you want my body and you think I'm -- ( a loud SMACK! follows)

SMILINGJACK: This conversation is over. Ooooooooover.
TANZY: Yes, daddy.

MIGHELLA: I haven't stripped down naked in a long time.

WEIX: Weix hate fire. Fire burn Weix.

TAILFAN: Here, here, little paladin boy! (in falsetto)

IRENKE: Poor Kril. He's getting an education tonight.
YAVIEL: I am, too!

KYLOZO: Our guild isn't something we want our families to hear.

NAKGUG: Nuke the shield!
ANYST: Aye aye, Captain. Nuking shields!
WEIX: I'm giving it all she's got!

WEIX: He's keeping it real. (about Krilari)
ANYST: But is he keeping it funky?
WEIX: He's a teenage boy. Everything about him smells funky.

WEIX: Yarr, I be after your treasure chest.

WEIX: Yarr, maybe later I can show you my scurvy. I call it my Jack Sparrow.

TANZY: Arr, come on to the plank if ye be wantin' my lovin'. Er, healin'.

TANZY: Uh, what do I do?
BLACKSHAE: Stand in a corner and pout.

WEIX: You're going to give that guy a complex. 'You all hate me.' (about Smilingjack)
IRENKE: We do.

TANZY: Your mother stinks.

BLACKSHAE: Look! I'm beside myself.
WEIX: Wakka wakka.

BLACKSHAE: You've been claimed by the Banshee queen. (to Yaviel)
WEIX: Which means that you get the dental plan.
NAKGUG: That's not necessarily a good thing. Jack's on the same plan and he's missing a lower jaw.

KYLOZO: Okay, whoosh! Off to the Internets.

AZIN: Dammit, Terakin. I'm a tank, not a healer.
LOKAAS: He's dead, Jack.

TERAKIN: I like it hard!

IRENKE: Mig's pictures is in the dictionary under sarcasm.
MIGHELLA: And hermaphrodite.

KRILARI: You can't ignore its girth.

TYIN: You bitch-ass! (to Barataur)
LUJZA: Oh my.

JUNINDI: Jack stole my balls.
DESMERELDA: Not a big heist.
JUNINDI: Fuck you.

KRILARI: A blood elf that doesn't talk. Huh. At least he can't say anything stupid.
MAEDEA: (laughs) You're funny.

KRILARI: Side effects of Mind Vision may include paralysis of the upper and lower body.

WEIX: Tanzy's better than all of you. He's the only one who will play gay pirate with me.

AZIN: Come to my nipple, bird!

JUNINDI: Who spells World of Warcraft with W's?
SMILINGJACK: Just stop talking, Juni.

SMILINGJACK: One day, Juni, you'll learn to end one sentence earlier.
WEIX: Or with a 'D'urrr'.

WEIX: The only time Mig apologizes is for everyone sucking more than he does.

TANZY: We're Tribute to Mortality. If it doesn't take a long time, it doesn't matter.
IRENKE: Too bad your wife can't say that, Tanzy, when it comes to you.

KYLOZO: Mig had one. I wanted one, too!
SMILINGJACK: If Mig jumped off of a bridge, would you jump with him?
KYLOZO: I'd want my own bridge!

DESMERELDA: I see a butt pirate and it's not Jack. His name is Kylozo and we won't cut him any slack.

DESMERELDA: New Guild Rule: slap noobs upside the head with a slab of porky goodness. Carry on, peoples.

TANZY: Hey, I'm trying to enjoy this as much as possible. I wanna go tickle the humans!

KRILARI: Wow, this staff is even more sparkly than Edward in sunlight!

KHABIBULIN: I'm sorry, but it's just so shiny.

SMILINGJACK: Remember, guys, this isn't a porno. The goal isn't to get sprayed on during this fight.

IMACABOOSE: How about you run me nonstop through dungeons to get to 70?
AZIN: I would hate to take away the pleasure you get out of leveling and the sense of accomplishment.

MIGHELLA: I don't need any other mount. I fly on stars. I'M A CELEBRITY???

MIGHELLA: Gee whiz...

SMILINGJACK: We don't need another eBay death knight.
TANZY: Yeah, we already have Mig. (simultaneously)
INUNE: Yeah, we already have Mig. (simultaneously)

IRENKE: Mighakin.
SMILINGJACK: That's like a bad Transformer name!

SMILINGJACK: Let's get our combat faces on!

SMILINGJACK: We down bosses. I swear. We didn't steal this raid ID.

AZIN: Whodiddat?

MIGHELLA: It's like Wintergrasp, right?
TERAKIN: 'xactly. South tower.

KYLOZO: I think that you should go for the bitches.

INUNE: Some people surf the internet; Kylozo swims.

NAKGUG: I think you rezzed into my explosion.
RAYTHE: You have a little Nakgug on your shoulder. You might want to wipe that off.
TYIN: Eww! Get it off! Get it off!

BARATUAR: Why is 'girlfriend' a bad word?
TYIN: 'cause your mom would rather you stick with calling her mom.

TANZY: Jack, can you kick me off of your thing? I can't get off.

TANZY: All aboard the Tribue healing train! Choo-choo!

LOKAAS: So, Jack, have you found your jaw yet?
SMILINGJACK: No, I haven't.
IRENKE: Have you checked Lokaas's pants?
SMILINGJACK: Well, I actually choke on small objects, so it wouldn't be there.

KRILARI: Why would anyone hand over an Orphan to you?
MIGHELLA: With the horns and the piercings..
KRILARI: He's only a death knight, totally legit.

TANZY: I didn't touch anything! I was munching on a potato chip!

KHABIBULIN: I need to leave Gen -- Oh, shit!

LOKAAS: Kril had another oops!

IRENKE: No, my sack!

KYLOZO: Well apparently you was havin' your ways with a draenei female.

AZIN: Get this Tactician off me! Hes dry humping me!

MIGHELLA: You need to kill the orbs that do the Shoop da woop thing.


KYLOZO: I have three clock radios in my room.
MAEDEA: You need three alarms to wake you up?
KYLOZO: ... Yes...

MAEDEA: Hey Azin, how is Dalaran?
AZIN: Safe.

KRILARI: Since when have you cared about your comrades? (concerning Mighella)
INUNE: Since when it could be used as an excuse for Defile.

TERAKIN: I need some angry masturbation or a good run. I'm going to scream 'DEFILE ME!' while I do it, too.

WEIX: Hey, least you are not Canadian. They only get 1.3 badges instead of the normal 2.

SMILINGJACK: Irenke, why are you ignoring me?!?!?!

LOKAAS: 'My sparkle pony is cute. It shoots rainbows out of its butt.'(quoting Mighella)
SMILINGJACK: You know what? You just used 'cute' in a sentence -- give me your man card.
LOKAAS: I have a daughter. I have an exemption.
IRENKE: But so did you, Jack.
MAEDEA: Jack doesn't have a man card since he watched Twilight.

Guild Message of the Day: Good news, everyone! The slime pipes are flowing again!
IRENKE: Does that mean that Jack's men are marching again?

INUNE: One! Two! Three! Three players to wipe the raid! Hah hah hah! (like Count von Count)

KYLOZO: I hope I get ice cream from that Sack of Frosty Treasures!

DESMERELDA: You can do so many bad things with two dollars bills and then send them in a sticky envelope.

KYLOZO: Hey, I'm not as much as a dick as you think. I'm just stupid.

KYLOZO: Does anyone want any Sulfuron Slammers?
MAEDEA: If you do it, Kylozo, I'm kicking you out of the guild.
KYLOZO: I don't want to. I don't think that I can find a guild with a bigger bunch of retards.

MIGHELLA: Hey, Matt. Apparently you can Bloodlust now.
TAILFAN: Yup. I'm angry tree.

IRENKE: One of the kids was named 'diarrhea.'
INUNE: Oh man, that poor kid...
IRENKE: Yeah, no shit... I DID NOT SAY THAT.

INUNE: So I guess you're saying that we couldn't tame our sense of humor.

TAILFAN: The bear brings all the girls.
BEEFE: I think you mean the Beefe.

IRENKE: Once you go gnome, you never go home.

LOKAAS: Jack's way too ugly to have orc in him.

SMILINGJACK: FI or FO: Fit In or Fuck Off.

JUNINDI: Uh, what was that?
WEIX: That was a bad touch.

TYIN: Do we kill Juni?
WEIX: ...tempting.

LOKAAS: What's up?
IRENKE: Jack's blood pressure.

JUNINDI: The day that I get respect is the day that Shae gets a top-end weapon.

MIGHELLA: Anything is possible with the power of LOLs.

KYLOZO: Squiggles and Fuckface -- it's perfect!

BAKARDI: Yeah, I know. I'm old. I use a cane to hit the key that makes Hand of Reckoning go.

KYLOZO: Shut up! More mana; more bitches!

KYLOZO: They snuck up on me.
TAILFAN: They're a tower of pygmies! How could they sneak up on you?

KYLOZO: Oh, I'm Revered with the Rama Llama Mans!

TAILFAN: Holy Crap!
KYLOZO: What the fuck?!
MIGHELLA: What's that?


KYLOZO: Walk like a man. Die like a man?

MIGHELLA: It's okay. I've got Blood Presence.

KRADDAWN: Ragnaros's pad is pretty pimp. Must get all the elemental hoes.
BLACKSHAE: Yeah, they are pretty hot.

KYLOZO: They think we stoopid, Mig. They think we stoopid.

WEIX: It's a double entendre.
KYLOZO: I heard that hurts.

MIGHELLA: Me and Juni rock at this achievement stuff.
IRENKE: Especially the dying part.

WEIX: When Tanzy logs in it's better than ice cream and orgies!

SMILINGJACK: All those kids are just a cover for your repressed homosexuality. (about Tanzy)

WEIX: Good news, everyone! You're all going to fucking die.

RAYSTLINN: Do you want some cream and sugar with your QQ?


Irenke has died.
SMILINGJACK: Don, your comment was so stupid it killed Irenke!

IRENKE: I hate you, Mig.
KYLOZO: Doesn't everyone?

MIGHELLA: At least our repairs are less.
IRENKE: So we pay less each time Mig wipes us?

SMILINGJACK: I never met my father.
WEIX: I've got news for you, Jack. I am your father. (mimicking Darth Vader)

Smilingjack has died.
LOKAAS: Thanks, Jack. I needed a laugh.
SMILINGJACK: Fuck you, Lokaas.

Smilingjack has died.
SMILINGJACK: That gold's a bribe.
IRENKE: To not post the quotes on the forum?SMILINGJACK: Yeah.IRENKE: Too late!

TANZY: Leave already so that you can come back and I can make fun of you some more. Woosaw!

SMILINGJACK: I hate you all.

MIGHELLA: I keep my taunts on my bar.
KYLOZO: We know.

IRENKE: I prefer big noses on my men.
TANZY: 'cause in a '69 my humpty nose will tickle ya rear. My nose is big, uh-uh I'm not ashamed. Big like a pickle, I'm still gettin' paid.
KYLOZO: ... uh, what?

RAYSTLINN: I'm not going to stoop to Tanzy's level. It's like stepping in a pile of dog crap.

TANZY: Oh, we can have a pally sandwich! We'll have Tanzy on one end, Tyin on the other, and everyone else in between!

TYIN: I understand being polite, but --.
IRENKE: Do you? Do you really?

TANZY: Hey Tyin.
TYIN: Hey.
TANZY: Put your back to the wall.
TYIN: Nah, I'm good.

TYIN: Damn, I keep running from Lokaas's thing. ... I should clarify that.

IRENKE: That's it, I'm jumping off the edge!
TANZY: Does that work?
TYIN: It does. I should know.

TYIN: Oh, I almost got off.

TANZY: I'm the devil. Fussball's also the devil.

IRENKE: I was 100% certain that I'd fucked up, until I noticed that Tanzy just wasn't picking it up.

TANZY: I saw a skull, so I attacked!

IRENKE: Oh my God! Tyin survived!
Tyin has died.
TYIN: Nevermind.

TYIN: I thought I --.
SMILINGJACK: Just run back in Tyin!
TYIN: But I --.
SMILINGJACK: Run, Tyin, run!

WEIX: Hey, Jack, what year is it in Canadian time?

IRENKE: You can't have Tanzy laughing that much.
TANZY It's too much!

TANZY: I'm okay.
TYIN: I think I'm going to make it.
Giggling ensues.
TANZY: No I'm not!

PNUTDASHAMMI: I'll go look at myself in the mirror and repeat to myself inspirational sayings.

TANZY: And in the annals of Tribute to Mortality thou shalt be known as 'Dick'. (about Pnutdashammi)

Pnutdashammi fondles Zahrah.
Pnutdashammi spanks Zahrah.
Pnutdashammi blows Zahrah a kiss.
Pnutdashammi loves Zahrah.
SMILINGJACK: Pnut, you're action packed with issues.

SMILINGJACK: The only one who's allowed to motorboat my tits is Lokaas.

TYIN: I think that I've been clenching my teeth. My jaw hurts.
TANZY: That's not from clenching your jaw!

TANZY: Quote it! Quote it!

WEIX: You only masturbate to self-portraits. (about Mighella)

SMILINGJACK: That thing is possessed by the ghost of Gruul! It was after you, Irenke! (about Arcanotron)

KYLOZO: Stand back, it's a Jack attack.!

WEIX: Juni is my favorite, Juni and me are like peas and carrots.

WEIX: Mama always said Juni is as Juni is.

WEIX: Life is like a box of Juni, you never know if your gonna get a Blackshae.

SMILINGJACK: He who runs away --
TANZY: -- is a scared little bitch.
SMILINGJACK: Big bitch, actually.

IRENKE: Holy shit! It's Kril! We just had your funeral in-game earlier this week.
KRILARI: Hey, guys. Sorry about being so inacti- ...
TANZY: It was a pretty ceremony. You would've been proud.


MIGHELLA: It hurts to touch it, but we have holograms! It's cool.

SMILINGJACK: Weix has the touch.
WEIX: Bad touch.

MIGHELLA: I don't wanna get up.

TALLAA: I want to touch myself, but, well, the kids are here...

IRENKE: Welcome to Tribute to Mortality. Here's your repair bill. (to Mvura)

SMILINGJACK: Do you fucking idiots want me to come or not?!?

SMILINGJACK: I'll strut around Orgrimmar naked if it'll get us raiders.

IRENKE: Yay, you suck less.
TANZY: Yay, shut up.

KYLOZO: No, you eat the frost nightmare that we give you!

KYLOZO: The safety word's Oklahoma.

MAEDEA: Wait. Why is the safety word Oklahoma?

SMILINGJACK: Aye, laddie! I'm goin' ta put a curse on you.
KYLOZO: Seamus Angryboots?


IRENKE: Lucky, not good? (about Smilingjack)
SAMICH: Yeah, lucky. Jack fails.

IRENKE: We're a nation that wants instant gratification -- and even that's not quick enough.

MAEDEA: Gimme sec. I need to get the phone book.

TANZY: I'll eat anything once.
TANZY: Food. Food.


MVURA: What's even better is he wears the wand in his crotch slot and pelvic thrusts while saying "Ungh" to do damage. (about Smilingjack)

KRAMO: Sex isn't enough. I had to do more.

TAILFAN: Shut up, bitch! (to Kramo)
KRAMO: He hurt my feelings.

PYRELLE: I have tits. And they're amazing.

TAILFAN: Can you polymorph those two?
PYRELLE: Sorry, dude. I'm not specced for polymorph.

SMILINGJAC: Mig knows all about ingesting sperm.

KRAMO: That's a shaman ability, right?
IRENKE: Wait, are you joking?

PYRELLE: I kill dargunz gud. (sic)
WHYAT: You spelled dragunz wrong. (sic)

IRENKE: If it's spinning, don't fuck it.

KYLOZO: Gangstas roll silently like G's in lasagna.

MIGHELLA: Roar are you ethnic at all?

SAMICH: I guess that you could say that, with this boss, the cat is out of the bag.
SMILINGJACK: Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah! (simultaneously)
IRENKE: Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah! (simultaneously)
KYLOZO: Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah! (simultaneously)

SMILINGJACK: Please enjoy your stay with Tribute airlines. Where the Fail is always free.

LOKAAS: Tyin's thinking, everyone take cover.
TYIN: Yeah, I'm just here for my body.
LOKAAS: That's right, meat shield.

TAILFIN: I need to afk for five men.

PYRELLE: Krillikins McSnugglemuffin

TANZY: I really hope Halfus drops my pants tonight.

WEIX: I had to revitalize your pumpkins today. (to Koggs)
IRENKE: Is that a euphemism or something?

MIGHELLA: Lesbians are good at playing DKs. I am convinced.

MIGHELLA: I just drooled.
MIGHELLA: Oh no reason. I wasn't paying attention.

WEIX: Hey Jack.
WEIX: When a ready check comes up in Canada, does it say Ehhh or whatever Hoosier?

AZIN: I'm a Real Boy!

MIGHELLA: Canadians are a weird race. Roll a Canadian. Why? The only Racial they get is 'Eh' after every sentence.

TIGGER: You go -30 to -40 for 4 months of the year.. Eh = Eternal Hell

MYSTEARICÀ: Krysin gave me his dice before he left :l
VEXEDVIXEN: I'm sorry to hear that.

SMILINGJACK: With pink hair, she is gonna be a herbalist so I can pick FLOOOWWWWWWWWWERRRRRSSSS.

MIGHELLA: Sin had a fun time in Heroics today with Tyin, Roar and I. IT WAS FANTASTIC.
SINISTIR: Best. Shaman. EVAR.

AZIN: You have some deep rooted childhood trauma.... Go get therapy (about Mighella)

AZIN: You don't play like a chick... Chicks go all out... You're too timid.
AZIN: Gonna take a lot of work.
AZIN: Mae doesn't take any shit, I respect that. You on the other hand... ehhh...

VEXAL: She hit me. So I shot a rocket at her.

RUPEES: It's just a trial account. If I troll enough and have enough fun, I'll continue playing and join your shitty guild.

TYIN: Is that a dead Brox? I'm going to do stuff to it!
TANZY: Can I have a new platform, please?

NYKOLAS: I want to play with my penis, but I'm not sure if that helps.

TANZY: I had a comment, but --
LOKAAS: Surprise, surprise, surprise.

LUJZA: My mana pool is impotent.

SMILINGJACK: At least I'm hung like a rhino.

NYKOLAS: You're not Jack. Stop yelling at me! (to Tanzy)

GAROTHMUK: My internet is so GAY
RATHRYN: That's not a bad thing. You should accept your internet for who they are.

SMILINGJACK: Anyone's a tank who takes my cock.
Silence follows.
IRENKE: Phone book please?

RATHRYN: If you're going to roll like a bitch, you need to dress like a bitch.

ALLTHEA: Do you think that she can take all of us?
LANTRO: Oh, she can take that. All of that.
YATANA: Jesus...

YATANA: This is horrible!

KYLOZO: If you jump on her three times, she dies.

MYSTEARICA The delay in me popping was me eating chips.

KYLOZO: I don't like that I can't eat my friends.
BLACKSHAE: You astound me.

KYLOZO: Would you guys really be mad if you were missing an arm or something?

IRENKE: Motion of the ocean with potions ... and lotions.

LANTRO: It's an easier job. Except when people are standing in bad shit, like Kra-
MYSTEARICA: I was typing!

LEYGOLAS: It takes thought.
DRENSO: That's against our religion in this guild.

DRENSO: Tanzy's in the channel. He's the resident suck king.

BLACKSHAE: Get your orc butt off of me. (to Leygolas)

CLINDRIE: I do my own stunts.

WEIXENBOLT: Bring it on. You be Kristen Dunst and I'll be Elisha Dushku.

LANTRO: I'm facepalming right now.

DRENSO: Quit being a bitch and put your healing pants on. (to Tanzy)

TYIN: Jesus, I've only been back one day!

LUJZA: Tanzy's not a nice person.
TANZY: I'm a nice person. Fuck both of you. (to Lujza and Lokaas)

TYIN: Sometimes in the morning I have to piss so bad that I get lightheaded.

TYIN: You guys are just jealous of the force I can unleash.

BLACKSHAE: Are you doubting my DPS?

WEIX: It must be awful to be an Emo and a Raider.

KRADDAWN: Poor dps is like erectile dysfunction.

JAKSTRAW: Okay Mae, I hope you're on your A game tonight. I'm pretty wasted... Alright, let's do this.

LUJZA: Your totems amuse me. (to Mysterica)

TALLAA: What is that Affliction spell by warlocks?
DRENSO: Your face?


MYSTERICA: She has a desire to indulge in the male genitalia during this tussle with Mr. Nefarian, in laymen terms. (concerning Irenke)

TYIN: Where's Irenke?
(Moments pass)
IRENKE: What's so important that you had to interrupt Nef head?

GWINNETT: Can we get the other pally to put up Crusader Aura so we can run into the boss quicker?

SAMICH: I have no idea what I'm doing...

KYLOZO:Oh my God, my flock is so huge.

IRENKE: That's a quote.
KYLOZO: You don't understand. I'm the bird king.

INUNE: That's the last straw

MIGHELLA: I love that I can put myself on ignore.

MYSTERICA: Extremely. I have the weirdest boner right now.

LUZJA: I'm dripping all over myself.

IRENKE: Mae is a rose.
LOKAAS: Yeah, with stainless steel thorns.